Anger Management.

People are responsible for their actions and their words, and sometimes just because it makes you feel better to get something out, doesn't mean you have the right hurt or disrupt the lives people around you. That's just being selfish.
Anyway, that was me last night. Regressing to 2 years old.
I was awoken from my slumber at midnight....just as i had fallen asleep. It was the project manager at work calling my cell to tell me that they needed someone to test a build and sign off on this project release...which happened to be ready at 12am. He asked me, 'did i give you remote access yet?' and when i said, no he said..."well you're going to have to come in the office then. Good thing you live so close."

I did not choose to live downtown to become the token on-call team member.

Anyway, they also forgot to give me a taxi chit, so i decided to drive down. Not wanting to park in some shady out of the way lot, i parked right outside my building on the empty bay and king corner and figured i'd be in an out in less than an hour. Parking is supposed to be free at night and i found a spot with my bumper sticking slightly forward of the no parking sign.

I went up to my eerily empty office and the work went surprisingly smooth. Sweet. But then I glanced out the window at my car parked on the street just as this parking enforcer appeared out of nowhere and started writing a ticket for me.
F!!!!!!!!!

There was nothing i could do. I was on too high of a floor to run down and negotiate with him to stop so instead i knocked on the glass and gave him the finger from my 8th floor window.
Cranky from being ALONE in the office at 1:30 in the morning, I walked to my car and cursed at the yellow slip behind my windshield wiper. I figured it would only be $20...but no...it was $60....my bumper was sticking out into a Transit stop zone.
F!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway, this seemed to anger me more than it normally would just becuase it was late at night and i was cranky. I drove the 7 min drive home and stormed and stopmed angrily back into our appartment. When my husband asked me if everything was okay. This huge string of anger and frustration and profanity came out of me. And then I slammed the door and watched tv in the living room. An hour later when I had calmed down, I went back to bed to find Sharl tossing and turning in bed. I had woken him up and ruined his world. He couldn't go back to sleep at all. When I tried to appologize, he calmly and simply told me that I need to manage my anger better.

Deep down, I knew he was right and I shouldn't have assumed my little problem was important enough to disrupt the small home that we live in just because i was angry. Anyway, i got the morning off today so i feel well rested, while poor Sharl has to train a client and play basketball tonight on 3 hour sleep.

Lesson learned.