The director of my project is a super busy woman. All day she has back-to-back meetings, and if she is ever at her desk she is either on a conference call or buried under piles of documents barely lifting her head to acknowledge a queue of people lined up to waiting to speak to her. I've even seen people so desperate to catch up with her that they follow her down the elevator for her cigarette breaks or even following her to Go Train station. She's tries to maximizes every morsel of free time she can squeeze into a day to get the most amount of work accomplished.
Today I bump into my director in the women's washroom. Fixing her hair by the sink, she says to me, "Kimberly! I'm so glad I've caught you here, I've been meaning to get back to you about your interim review, I've rescheduled our meeting to Friday."
"Great," I reply. "I'll check update my outlook when I get back to my desk." My director then enters the toilet stall and I enter the stall at the opposite end.
She then continues to talk from within her stall over the sound of trickling pee resonating in the washroom, "Ohhh.. hey! how is A's retirement collection coming along? Last time we spoke, you said you raised about $120 everyone. I'm going to come by and pick it up from you when we get back alright? I was thinking we should get him a gift certificate to a sporting goods store. What do you think?"
"Um....yah, that sounds good." I say awkwardly as i pause over the toilet seat.
"I know he likes to play golf, because he has played with my husband on several occasions. But some golfers can be particular about the type of equipment that they like to use, so I think it would be best if we could just let him pick out what he would like."
Her pee sounds stop and she flushes the toilet.
"Uh-huh. yah, okay."
"Well, this is just a suggestion. I know A also really likes to garden. I suppose we could get him some bulbs or a nice plant. OR I know...maybe some sort of planting kit? Hmmm.. maybe that would be complicated. Yeah, i think we should stick with the sporting goods certificate, but what do you think, do you have any other suggestions?" I hear her exit the stall and the automatic faucets switch on as she washes her hands. I'm still frozen hovering over the toilet seat trying to will her out of the washroom. I can't pee under pressure.
"No, the certificate sounds find." I say.
"Because if you think that we should get something else, this was just my suggestion because I didn't know what else to give. Hey! I don't think you asked the offshore guys for money. Did you remember to ask them?"
"Yah, no, I forgot......"
At this point I realize that she is waiting for me to finish so she can walk back to my desk. I have not even made any pee sounds in the past 5 minutes of awkward washroom conversation. Realizing that peeing is just going to happen, I flush the blank toilet and emerge from the stall. The director is leaning on the edge of the sink counter waiting for me as i wash my hands. We walk back to my desk and I hand her the envelope of money that I had collected for A's gift. When my director leaves my cubicle, I wait 45 seconds for her to get back to her desk then bolt back to the washroom.
Meetings, regardless of the subject matter, are NOT appropriate in public washroom stalls. Some things are just not meant to be multi-tasked.
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