Oh my.. how I missed my computer. What's gone on since the blackout on Thrusday? That was kind of cool, by the way. I was at Applebee's when it happened. I was chilling with some co-workers in between my shifts and all of a sudden....silence...darkness...only not that dramatic. We ended up having a little party on the patio afterward and I didn't have to end up working that evening. I went for a walk with my brother later on that night to look at stars and take some weird pictures with his digicam. I don't think I'll ever witness mississauga in that much darkness again. *touch wood* The next day, I waited in line for like an hour to get gas because I decided, why not join the other paranoid freaks who don't have faith in north america's ability to fix the friggin electricity.
Saturday morning, I played in the girls exhibition softball game. I felt soooo out of place. Firstly, I was really fed up with shrill cutsie voices of.. um.. everyone. And I was not digging the "team spirit" vibe. Call me too cool or a bad sport, but I just wanted to play some friggin softball. I hate feeling like the butch or the outcast in a group of girls. Especially church girls. Stop gushing over my spiky hair and my pierced bellybutton, or why I still smell of alcohol. Old news, old phase, long night. Anyhow... the rest of the day was a better story. I went to a wedding, and got to dress in my new Holt Renfrew skirt (which my mom thinks is too short for someone my age! haha). The entire ceremony was done in Spanish which was really romantic, especially since I couldn't understand a thing and had to use my imagination.
I couldn't go to the reception though, becuase I had to work at 5:30.
Ahhh work... I seem to spend waaay too much time there, and I've actually begun hanging out with my co-workers quite a bit this summer. Since we all ended around the same time last night, we had a bit of a party on the patio... a couple rounds of tequilla and some red wine, it was a pretty fun time. I had to be up for 9am the next morning.. but hey.. what's sacrificing a couple hours of sleep? Which I suppose leads to another thing on my mind. I was out having fun and all... but at the end of the night, I didn't really take anything home with me that mattered. It lead me to thinking about the importance and the rarity in actually connecting with people on a sub-superficial level. I think it's beginning to depress me. And the fact that you can't meet those types of people EVERis just really sad. There are very few people that are worth your time... but when they are worth your time, you don't really have time to give them... GRRRRRRR to that too. It's equally frustrating. I guess that's why I have a hard time in just taking out the pruning shears. Where am I running with my life, and where is it taking me? Is that just my question of the summer. I wish I wasn't running alone becuase sometimes it takes me far away. And without those day-to-day interactions i sometimes feel as if I were growing off on a tangent. And it saddens me becuase I'm still very much in love, and not willing to give that up for anything. I am hoping that Sharl will come back to the same person he left.. or if she's not the same person, I have hope that he will be able to run with me off on that tangent. Sometimes I miss him so much it hurts. And sometimes it hurts when i don't miss him. There are only 8 more days left until I try to get back to normal.. normal in pjs, messy bed head, possum hugs and TLC. I want to get back to that but I don't want to give up the new person I've rediscovered. This somewhat more social and confident person I think I've grown into. Anyway.. I have a count down to when at least I can feel at home with the one I love and just melt in his arms and realize everything will be just fine.